May 2025, London
The exam period has begun (and now ended) and as expected, the pressure that comes with it, was palpable. Overwhelming.
3rd year of Osteopathy Masters Degree seems to be the great equalizer. Huge amount of content. High level of stress. High dropout rate. Survival of the fittest.
Some of my colleagues said: ”This year nearly broke me”. Trying to juggle life, work and studies is an enormous feat, especially when most of us are no longer 20-year-olds living with the parents, and cramming pathologies in-between Student Union parties, Netflix series and library hangouts. You take every tube ride, every walk to the station, every work break to study. Revising notes while cooking. Recall practice before bed and as soon as you wake up.
The clinical pathology exam prep has been time-consuming, but beyond that, it dragged me in one rabbit-hole after another, and there was no end in sight. The pathologies just kept on coming. Because the human body is such a complex creation with intertwined systems, one never stops to marvel how one fault somewhere in the system, causes domino effect and wreaks havoc everywhere else. And that is what we are learning to pick up as Osteopaths. Screening the systems, asking the right questions, picking up subtle cues, assessing and examining the body, linking clues, stirring the conversation to get the right info out of the patient and being kind, respectful and professional while doing it.
Now, back to my point on perspective.
The world and your daily life go out of focus for those high pressure weeks, when tension is ramping up. The clock is ticking reminding you how many things you still don’t know or have already forgotten. You develop a tunnel vision. Time stops. You can’t hear the phone buzzing. You stop paying attention. You lose perspective.
In 2 years, I will be one of the seniors preparing for the final clinic exam to become a licenced Osteopath. And that comes with an unsettling ”now or never” feeling. Exciting? Scary? Nerve-racking?
Yes, yes and yes!
I hope you are getting the vibe – because this is just a backdrop of the little story I want to share here.
One of my college colleagues, who is French and in her 50s, had this grand plan of moving back to her home country after her final exams, so she can be closer to her aging mum, her close cousin, the only family she had left. She kept saying ”as soon as I am done, I will pack my bags and figure out how to do Osteopathy there”. As an expat, I completely get those family dilemmas: aging parents, the dread of missing out on family events, every trip reminding you of how much you have missed. And that even though the time may have stopped for you temporarily, objectively, it does not really stop for anyone else.
But you grind, to the next ”as soon as”, next task, next year.
And then it happens. You get that call.
2 weeks ago, in the midst of the pre-exam upheaval, I saw my French colleague, gave her our customary ”Bisous, bisous, ca va cherie?” expecting some update on her pre-exam mood. She looked at me with the sad eyes, and says ”My mum died.”
My friend went pale, her lip started to quiver, tears were rolling down her cheeks. ”Her arm was hurting, she felt weak, so she went to bed early. I told her on the phone: Relax, rest, we’ll talk tomorrow. She didn’t wake up.”
But she wasn’t done. She slowly continued uttering words in between sobs: ”My cousin, yk, also died the day before, yk, she was quite ill. I do , yk, not have any reason to move back to France now”.
How things can change in a blink of an eye.
I wanted to share this story, because I am pretty sure we all know THAT someone. Someone chasing their career, the next big idea, postponing calls, and always coming up with a ”too busy, soz” response. Maybe you are one of them.
When your world shrinks to a single goal, because of that NEXT BIG goal you are so desperately chasing, the life still goes on. The blinders we’ve got on block our perspective, and it is easy to lose sight of everything else. Often the most important things.
Whatever you are chasing, it is so incredibly easy to miss things happening around you. Much bigger, irreversible, life-changing things.
Man, that really hit me hard. I got that weird feeling in my gut – because I know I tend to do that – hunker down, grind and go offline when working towards something “important”. I am and always used to be a ”as soon as” person.
Truly heart-breaking, but powerful reminder: you’ve got only one life (so yes, go for it, aim high) but so does everyone else.
And when your stress, your challenges, your struggle take the centre stage of your little universe, remember worse s##t is happening to someone else. Do not lose perspective. Do not lose sight of what life is really about.
I leave this post here as a reminder to myself for the unsettling times in the future. I hope this helps some of you too.
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